Friday, September 11, 2009

Absolute Cinematic Garbage

Mother of Tears (2007)

One of the film's highlights, some poor woman being strangled with her own intestines.

Mother of Tears or La Terza Madre is an Italian horror film directed by Dario Argento (Tenebrae, Suspiria). It is the last film of a loosely connected trilogy created by Argento. The first film is Suspiria and the second is Inferno. Argento’s influence on horror and slasher films is undeniable and it is hard for me to criticize him openly, but this was a shameless and shallow effort to say the least. Suspiria is arguably a masterpiece of the horror genre for its visual style, soundtrack, and unnerving suspense. Here though, Argento abandons those strengths in favor of gratuitous nudity and often completely ridiculous, albeit at times shocking, murder sequences. There are endless complaints about this film but most of them are quite superficial and apparent only moments in. Examples include; misplaced accents, unconvincing and often wooden acting, unlikely dialogue, and a plot that is not even worth engaging.

The villianesses in Mother of Tears stalk their prey with one tit out at all times.

Sarah is played by Asia Argento (Dario’s daughter). She is an American studying in Rome. She helps uncover a relic that unleashes the Mother of Tears and all of her evil powers unto the world. Worshippers across the city begin lashing out in order to honor her return and all out chaos starts.

Blood, fire, naked girls; what else could you ask for from a shitty horror movie.

The only thing that creeped me out about this movie was the fact that Dario Argento’s film contains a gratuitous shower scene starring his own daughter. This is something he has done before and it just gives me the creeps. At least more so than a women being choked with her own intestines which is really just so ridiculous it becomes funny, but then again maybe that’s your thing. I regretfully but confidently refuse to recommend this movie to anyone, even the hardcore fans.

My rating is 1/2 out of 5 stars.

[Via http://kaseydriscoll.wordpress.com]

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