She had been waiting for this date for long: lots of nights & letters & bottles of whiskey, a large amount of solitude, 7 poems, 15.968.984 cigarettes, pages, words
desire
song.
As in the movies, she dressed to kill: the specific & obvious way a woman has to express that she wants to go right under the skin. Our intuition always whispers us in front of the mirror. The right dress & way of wearing it, the right stockings & lipstick, the right perfume. The attitude of a hunter.
When she was walking to the bar, she found a card on the street. That was certainly a gift from the future, a kiss from fate. She believed it because she knew there was something very special with this man, this was not the only uncanny sign.
She stepped into the bar. He was there, drinking beer from a bottle, already drunk, also looking as a hunter. Years later he reckoned that he had to drunk for being ready for her. She understood it perfectly.
There was no fear in her: she left it behind, in a box, as a book to read slowly, with time. So she was ready to make love to him since the moment she opened the door of the bar. But he was not. He needed to talk. He needed to get it out of his chest. Everything. Everything…A delicious mixture of poetry, fear, desire & beer breath that she listened patiently. Yes, this is also the work of a lover.
They changed the bar time & again. At some point, rejection came with some kind of violence. She knew it. She also had stored her anger in another box. So she faced his rejection ’cause she knew she had to do it. She reacted properly, as a fine actress, because he needed that. She did it for love ’cause she knew he was also doing that for love.
Exhausted, absolutely drunk, tumbling, hitting the streets, laughing, in love, they arrived to the Hotel and checked in. She wishes she could remember the number of the room, but she was too drunk… so in love.
- I just can’t believe it: you are under me, he said already nude on the hotel bed.
- … and you are on top of me, she answered already nude.
( … )
Early in the morning she woke up and got ready to leave. Yes, she left a red kiss on the mirror of the hotel bathroom. In the corner, the Ace of Hearts that she found some hours ago. He would find those movie-things-like in his life, in his reality. She spent some minutes looking at his love sleeping for the first time. She took that picture with her memory and closed the door carefully.
3 or 4 years later they finished their book of love, one of the most beautiful books 2 lovers can write. You just have to look at a summer night and drink the stars to feel it.
Desire is not just fucking. There is a “before” & an “after”. Always. Even when it is just the gaze of a second… ’cause they are the rules of the Ace of Hearts.
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